Yesterday was Nirjal Ekadashi. The story of this Ekadashi specifically mentions that the one who is unable to fast on any other Ekadashi that appears throughout the year, should fast on this one. And it's been quite a while since I fasted on Ekadashi. Not because I feel I don't need to, I just find myself physically and mentally unable to observe a complete fast (that is fasting from and focussing on all four aspects that affect the mind - ahar, vihar, achar, vichar). My intelligence and the demands of my karma do not permit me to starve myself and weaken my body, which anyways defeats the purpose of fasting).
History has no account of any one who attained God simply by starving or weakening their body. The purpose of observing a fast is to atleast make an effort towards choosing your food, lifestyle, behaviour and thoughts such that a God would. Like Gandhiji said 'be the change you wish to see in the world'. I don't understand any other way of attaining God.
So, did I choose my food, lifestyle, thoughts and behavior wisely this Ekadashi? No not quite ideally I would say. I did every single thing which the books condemn. But when I woke up this morning, a new light dawned upon me. Before sunrise, my mind urged me to wake up to perform Surya Arghyam but my body just did not cooperate.
And yet my thoughts, when I finnaly woke up, this morning as soon as the sun rose, provided me the strength I lacked yesterday. It's a feeling of having pleased all the navagrahas, all the gods and deamons at the same time. I have no desire or thought this morning except a feeling of thankfulness in my heart for Krishna. But can I explain it? No. I certainly can not.
All I know is reading with love for and faith in God does change you. You stop fearing all that is mortal and even mortality itself, while your mind focuses on what needs to be done in the short while we stay on earth.
I understand how reading is an important skill, Education is important too even though schooling may not be. And even if I were to not do anything, destiny will eventually take its course. So I'd rather do and die than regret having not done enough at the time of my death. This feeling is what I equate to the presence of a God in my life. If he has given me the strength to come this far, its not merely so I could just sing songs of praise for the Lord. When he shows you a path, its important you walk it. And it's also important that you try to find his footprints on every path you decide to walk on. That alone is my religion. That alone is my pillar of strength.
History has no account of any one who attained God simply by starving or weakening their body. The purpose of observing a fast is to atleast make an effort towards choosing your food, lifestyle, behaviour and thoughts such that a God would. Like Gandhiji said 'be the change you wish to see in the world'. I don't understand any other way of attaining God.
So, did I choose my food, lifestyle, thoughts and behavior wisely this Ekadashi? No not quite ideally I would say. I did every single thing which the books condemn. But when I woke up this morning, a new light dawned upon me. Before sunrise, my mind urged me to wake up to perform Surya Arghyam but my body just did not cooperate.
And yet my thoughts, when I finnaly woke up, this morning as soon as the sun rose, provided me the strength I lacked yesterday. It's a feeling of having pleased all the navagrahas, all the gods and deamons at the same time. I have no desire or thought this morning except a feeling of thankfulness in my heart for Krishna. But can I explain it? No. I certainly can not.
All I know is reading with love for and faith in God does change you. You stop fearing all that is mortal and even mortality itself, while your mind focuses on what needs to be done in the short while we stay on earth.
I understand how reading is an important skill, Education is important too even though schooling may not be. And even if I were to not do anything, destiny will eventually take its course. So I'd rather do and die than regret having not done enough at the time of my death. This feeling is what I equate to the presence of a God in my life. If he has given me the strength to come this far, its not merely so I could just sing songs of praise for the Lord. When he shows you a path, its important you walk it. And it's also important that you try to find his footprints on every path you decide to walk on. That alone is my religion. That alone is my pillar of strength.
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